Monthly Archives: February 2014

MY ALTERNATE PERSONA 1

Three days ago, I was at my regular Bar, THE DOMINO. There I met a girl. Well, I admit she’s hot, and after a few glasses, we got talking. I maintained my usual cool and slick attitude and expectedly, I could see that she was for the taking. Her increased animation gave her away. With my moves, even the TAO OF BADASS would have been proud of me. (Google him).

 

Anyway, here we are today, I’m back home feeling cool with myself. Though she ended up being flustered and somewhat embarrassed, I’m pretty sure she just feigned it. She was silent throughout on my way to drop her at her place. Well, it happened that I made mention of how amazing I was tonight in the midst of our usual ‘small talk’ and then she burst into a fit of laughter. I had this to say. Maybe that’s why her mood changed all of a sudden:

 

Up until now, I have been locked in a captivating atmosphere with you. We’ve made subtle brushing and touching gestures, we’ve talked about my ideas on stuff based on my experiences and the things I learn everyday. You must admit I’m awesomely attractive. You don’t need to ask me how I know this to be a fact. Your actions show it; your soft purrings and head nodding in acknowledgement of the sexual effect I’ve had on you thus far, and yes, those puppy eyes betray you. Need I mention the indelible glint I see in your eyes whenever I’m around you? Or the girlish chatter that takes you over whenever you’re in my company? Let’s face it, you’re shamelessly and hopelessly drawn to me, and it’s not difficult to see why. There are not many people alive with my pull, not many exist with my drive, the value I provide you and people around me with is so immense that I’m not sure you guys can function properly without me. So you can stand there and laugh all you like, I shall not flinch nor blink. You know as well as I do that you’re never gonna find someone like me. I’m that amazing.

After this, then I had my laugh too:

 

Buhahahaha. You need to see your face. Okay, maybe I exaggerated a bit, but then, still, if you must know, I can have any type of girl I want any time I want. And, YES! I actually am sure I’m awesome.

                                                                                                                … TO BE CONTINUED

P.S. – This is my alternate persona, probably not a true representation of who you believe me to be. Heck, it’s Friday, a little fooling around is welcome. No?

 

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LITTLE DETAILS

It’s the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen.

– John Wooden

 

I once heard the story of a couple that got divorced. The final termination of their marriage found its root in the fact that both of them had different ideas on where the toothpaste tube should be pressed; top or bottom. This set into motion a series of other events that culminated in the breakup. Maybe it’s a fictitious story!

 

In my workplace, my immediate boss – though normally irritable – took the time to tell some of us under him a story of how his fraternizing with existing workers (when he just got employed) and staying behind a little after closing hours resulted in him being handed a powerful machine (computer). And I mean powerful. His fellow new intakes didn’t get a thing by the way. Maybe he juiced his story up!

 

I could go on with the “cool stories” but the idea is basic: Little details go a long way in shaping the course of our lives. Very popular these days is the attitude of negligence; the refusal to tidy up loose ends because we consider them too trivial. The sad thing is that in the fiercely competitive age we’re in, these seemingly insignificant details are the things that can give you the edge in the midst of equally qualified candidates.

 

It’s not only about how an extra accessory to your clothing will get you the job. It could be about how an extra “primness” in appearance or finesse in speech/attitude might get you the girl. It could be about how a few lines of extra courtesy can make your letter/mail fall into fertile grounds. It could be that extra effort it took you to compliment someone’s appearance or quality that expands your network and positions you for future aid. It could be about how an extra hour of studying a little beyond the confines of the curriculum can propel you into an exciting field of specialization. It could be about how an extra minute of patience can save you from a ghastly accident.

 

I’m sure you’re already considering a host of other instances. That’s the spirit. It’s all about considering the little details others neglect. I hardly remember much of O-level chemistry these days but I can still recall the function of a catalyst in a chemical reaction; to speed up the process. Let’s just say observance of these ‘little details’ is the catalyst you need to enjoy progress in that area you’re thinking about this very minute. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.

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Time’s n’er ‘gon be enough

Carpe Diem, quam minimum credula postero. (Seize the day, placing as little trust as possible in the next)

– Anonymous

 

There will soon be a time when I shall have all the time in the world to learn all the programming languages I wish to learn, know all the scrabble words I need to know to be an authority in professional scrabble circles, be that well known editor and author at least around the country if not around the globe, make those legendary innovations and propose multiple theories in the field of control engineering, become the renaissance man I have often dreamed of becoming since I was a kid; that autodidact whose knowledge and versatility will be an envy for contemporaries, an example for upcoming prodigies.

 

You see, the forementioned give a faint picture of the things that are important to me. Some of those things I’m well on the path to achieving, some others a long way away. For you also, I’m almost certain you have a series of tasks/achievements you intend to accomplish at some stage in life, but perhaps just like me, the time to accomplish all those things can only be achieved in the unlikely development of some twisted “healthy and acceptable case” of multiple personality disorder; which ensures that the time you switch off to ‘rest’ on one activity is well used up on the quest for proficiency in another area that means something to you by one or more of your alternate personas.

 

Sometimes, you wish you could hold still the arms of the clock. Sometimes, you wish you could reverse the years or have a perfect understanding of the quantum nature of the universe to enable you to change the past and future to suit your needs. Many times, you sigh and worry that the time to do all you seek to do isn’t going to be available to you. Many other times, you believe you’re never gonna be fulfilled given the speed with which the days pass. While some of these hold true, there is a realization you’re going to have to face sooner or later: ‘Time’s n’er ‘gon be enough.” That is basic!

 

To this end, it will serve you well to do what you can when you can. Quit putting stuff off for “later” unless totally unavoidable. Stratify your time to suit your most important values and tendencies; sometimes, it might be necessary for you to plan days ahead, write down activities you intend to undertake and time estimates for such activities, in short, let your goals be time bound. Even if you fail to meet up with your time targets, you’ll discover you are going to always be much closer than you would have been had there been no deadlines involved. Decide to spend a large chunk of your time on things you’ll be proud to announce you passed the time with. Forget about time not well spent; the time spent on worry and moaning is best spent on a new positive endeavor every time, EVERY TIME. 

 

Time waits for no one. The future is here and now. Do all you can when you can; Seize the day, placing as little trust as possible in the next. Time’s n’er ‘gon be enough anyway.

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“WHY” rather than “WHAT”

“Have the end in mind and make sure you are working towards it everyday.” – Anonymous

 

Logically, one could say tangibility should come before reason in any endeavour. More succinctly put, there should be “what one wants to do” before “why one wants to do it.” However, it is increasingly becoming evident that the effects of justifications for our decisions on perhaps our career choices or a next line of action in our daily lives outweigh the effects of the things we actually do.

 

Many people fail or get discouraged along the way majorly because they failed to convince themselves of a purpose in alignment with their intrinsic values and tendencies for their actions. Many programmers for instance will tell you that what kept them going even in times when their programming life seemed mundane and in absolute chaos was the fact that they held on to some strong motive that drove them to programming in the first place. It could be their appreciation of the creative nous behind computer applications, or a fascination with the web that is far greater than that of their peers. In a host of other fields as well, those that become exceedingly good in their positions most likely had some strong affinity for their likes that drove their passions and propelled them to their points of relevance. Hence, it is important that in your quest to make a name for yourself in any field, have an END in mind; picture what you consider as the prize/accolade at the end of your sojourn in the said field. This will serve as the motivating force, indeed it can be considered at the reason for your delving into such a venture.

 

The mind of the mortal man is full of diverse thoughts that could precipitate one form of resolution into action or the other. If the fellow is a wild/creative thinker, I think he is faced with a greater challenge than the ordinary everyday drab thinker. This is because there are many things he thinks he could do and be good at. If he is not careful, he will jump into action on any thought without proper consideration and might grow disinterested or discouraged along the line when it seems his efforts are becoming pointless or not resulting in immediate gratification.

 

It is imperative and indeed expedient to ascribe more priority to REASONS than to UNDERTAKINGS. This will ensure that in all your doings, you develop astute resilience even in the face of the impossible.  To help yourself, you could always remind yourself of your reasons for every action whenever you can, or do well to convince your close friends or at least people that have an influence in your life of the purpose of certain actions of importance in your life (if you so desire).

 

Remember, the WHY is way more important than the WHAT.

 

Have a solid day!

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LIKE A PHOENIX

Every crucial experience can be regarded either as a setback, or the start of a wonderful new adventure, it depends on your perspective.”Mary Roberts Rinehart

 

As we go through life, many of us discover strategies and action points we have to take to achieve the kind of lifestyle that we desire. Truth be told, some of us work diligently at it and see progress by the day. For some people, times of disappointments never come; times when you look back and wonder what the point of your striving to make yourself worth something is. For some others however, there is bound to be one setback or the other – setbacks that threaten to relieve us of any idea of ideality or correctness about any step/path we take.

 

Gone before us however are those that have suffered the loss of benefactors and mentors, those that have suffered rejection as well as scholastic and academic failure, those that have persisted with certain skill sets and failed to prevail, those that have tried all they could to acquire some position or quality and have failed. Some of these people have allowed themselves be beaten, some have resorted to a life lived through the motions, others have found a resilient spirit within them to prevail over all sort of obstacles placed in their parts.

 

This week, I encourage you to find that strength within you, be more positive at failure. As they say, when you fail at something, at least you figure out “what not to do.” The path to success and achievement can sometimes be mazy and requires those that probably have failed at one thing or the other to know the answers to any challenge life has to throw their way. Thomas Edison and Abraham Lincoln have long been sure benchmarks for overcoming failures and inhibitions. Look inward today. There’s probably something you’ve been failing a lot at, instead of giving up completely, look on the bright side, that thing/condition might be preparing you for “masterhood” – to know all there is to know on that subject. Like a phoenix, rise from the ashes of your failures and fly beyond your limitations.

 

Have a fulfilling week.

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DISPELLING MINDSETS

“We are what we are because we have been what we have been.”
                – Sigmund Freud

Sigmund Freud is widely regarded as the father of modern abnormal psychology. While going through some of his most notable work recently, I realized he was one blessed with a flexible mind. He did not make ridiculous assertions or accept hypothesi- not-based-on-thorough-synthesis. Rather, by a systematic and patient accumulation of data, – without preconceived bias – he observed trends a ‘thousand times’ till they began to tell him something. His extensive work in the area of dream psychology is of particular interest to me and should be also to one who has an open mind and isn’t plagued with a multitude of superstitious notions.

The purpose of the foregoing is merely to show a true to life example of one who was neither daunted by criticism of his contemporaries nor the ‘testimony of the prevailing circumstances’ in his time but chose to move forward at every turn wherever his investigations led him.

It is extremely easy to accept a prototypic and stereotypic way of thinking in this age. Afterall, there is reason to believe the world cannot bend itself to your command nor be made malleable by virtue of your exertions or actions.

Inaction has ruined many a youth as he has chosen to believe the report of the whispers of negative ill winds in all directions suggesting his personal inability or the unsuitability of his environment, or indeed the non-readiness of the world for his manifestation. Simply put, we allow ourselves be strangled by incessantly dwelling upon our past failures. We allow employers to dictate the path our lives take by their myopic determination of what we can or can’t do. We allow our lives be defined by laws and principles of life that might not have been put through proper experimental and experiential procedures.

You see, the onus lies on you to break free from the shackles that are holding you back from becoming the best you can be. We see that a huge chunk of the said shackles arise from what we have allowed ourselves to believe about ourselves and our environment. We constantly fail to change our living and working conditions because we have allowed mindsets build a castle over our heads.

Today, figure out the areas of your life in which you have become stagnant by virtue of believing too much in principles that do not suit your progress. Break some rules (in a positive sense), discard ‘norms’ that do not smile at your daring nature, allow your scientific self shine through, allow yourself to believe there could always be an anomaly to whatever the world has attached normalcy to that doesn’t bode well for your success. Release the adventure in you and create the paths you wish to tread instead of following ‘where the path leads.’

May the odds always be in your favor!

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EUREKA MOMENT

There’s a tide in the affairs of men which taken at the flood leads on to fortune.”

-William Shakespeare

 

It has been said that there is a chink in every armour. We see evidence of that in the biblical story of the conquest of Goliath by little David. Be it as it may that there was one weak point that allowed the slinging youth finish off the giant, it could be proposed that perhaps a second before or after the specific moment David struck will have been too late, simply because the trajectory of the smooth pebble taking the same course would have struck a well protected point on the terror-of-Gath’s helmet. In short, David took his chance and was rewarded for it.

 

While the intuition to know the exact moment to strike is accepted as divine, it must be said that such ‘moments’ exist in all fields and in all endeavors in life. For the purpose of this discuss, we shall call it the Eureka moment, with regard to the naked Archimedes sprinting down some Greek street repeatedly shouting “EUREKA!” after making some astonishing discovery on the subject of ‘floating’ in his bath tub.

 

It is a widespread belief that there is a grand script that is written already to propose where and when events will happen and we of the ever fading flesh have no power over such a deitic desigs. This may hold some weight depending on your religious belief. However, this is not the path we seek to tread today, it is matter for another day.

 

You see, whether you like it or not, the simple actions you take result in other related actions that keep producing further reactions to make the wheel that is called life keep rotating. It is what some term as the DOMINO EFFECT or CAUSE AND EFFECT. It implies that our actions or inactions set the tone for the course our lives take. If this be true, it means our thoughts, decisions, motions however infinitesimal account largely for our total makeup. This is why we should with our inside eye, see order in every chaotic situation; Order which can only be brought about by our deliberate actions which are TIME SENSITIVE.

 

I’ve always been a believer in the fact that there is strength in every weakness, boom in every gloom, opportunity in every adversity. Only one who comes to this realization will take necessary steps to keep being proactive irrespective of the disadvantage he considers himself burdened with. It isn’t just enough to see abilities in our inabilities, it is indeed necessary to try and take control by making use of the little resources that we have NOW rather than LATER.

 

Time prevents everything from happening at once and by so doing, ensures there is a chronological order to events. You don’t want to put the cart before the horse by failing to be insightful enough to know what to do per time. Use what is within your control now to spark a series of reactions that will bode well for your ordered future in this world of intense chaos.

 

May the odds always be in your favour!

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DRAWBACK(S) OF COMPARISON

“Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.”

– Shannon L. Alder

 

If you observe carefully, you see that nobody, whether child, youth or adult, likes to be compared to another in terms of achievement. Nobody likes to be run down just because someone, somewhere has been able to do something he hasn’t been able to do. The reason  for this not that difficult to determine.

 

Take for instance, I constantly tell a lover how another female I’m well acquainted with is more capable than she in almost all regards. Imagine for a minute how her disposition towards me will be constantly. Another example is when you sing the praises of some other child in the presence of a little one known to you, imagine how inadequate this known child will often feel. Thirdly, consider always making references to the achievements of other families to your spouse in a manner that provokes envy and a feeling of low esteem, imagine how broody your spouse will be all the time.

 

You see, the trend is there for all to see. It is very easy to compare people around us to other people, in subtle words or actions. When we do this, in the back of our minds, we believe we’re doing them a world of good whereas the opposite is the case. We believe turning their heads to see the accomplishments of others can spur them to breakthroughs when indeed this lopsided approach is what batters and eats them up and almost certainly ensures their heads never rise above the water of misery.

 

On to ourselves… This malady of undue comparism stretches its ugly tentacles to us. We see evidence of this in our incessant quest to measure our successes by the successes of others. Truth is, it’s very profitable to consider the hurrah moments and action points of others and challenge ourselves to do as well as they did to attain those heights. However, measuring our progress in an extremely parallel regard as far as time and quantity of achievement is concerned will serve us no good purpose.

 

No size fits all in the race for prominence and recognition in life. The shoe that fits John pinches Joe and vice versa. The time it takes for us to achieve the same results cannot and will never balance on an unbiased scale. The quantity/quality of our triumphs will never amount to the same thing. The fields in which we rise to prominence do not necessarily have to be the same. As they say, life is per head.

 

Many a battle has been lost in the quest to adopt the same approach as someone gone before us. The trick is to pick a little skill or quality here and there, combine this quality doggedly with our intrinsic personal values, apply both judiciously in our fields of interest and see ourselves soar beyond never-before-conceived heights.

 

Comparison they say is the thief of Joy and the more we sit down to overanalyze how we’re falling behind based on the perceived progress of others, the more we do not take necessary actions in propelling us to our points of relevance in life.

 

Find your niche. Work diligently at it. Don’t beat yourself up on what others can do that you can’t. Life is meant to be lived, not analyzed. Challenge yourself everyday and strive to be better than you were yesterday. That is the only real person you should consistently juxtapose your progress with; your yesterday self.

 

May the odds always be in your favour!

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DON’T GET TOO COMFORTABLE

“The habits of a vigorous mind are born in contending with difficulties.”  
―     Abigail Adams

 

 

I wish I could say for a fact the average human thrives on challenges, thrives on  the glorification that commitment to tasks normally beyond his capacity bring with it. Alas, this is not so. Like bees drawn to sweet nectar, a large percentage of human beings seek comfort of the body, soul and spirit. While this could be a worthy quest, the constant refusal to demand of oneself the extra effort to make it a reality is sorely lacking in most individuals.

 

I believe ‘absolute comfort’ is a mirage. I believe the thirst for attainment of ‘absolute comfort’ is the thinking of a vain man. I believe the actual attainment of this state cannot be as pleasing as one would have thought before one attained it. I believe what keeps most of us alive and bustling is the waking up every day to face challenges that are beyond what we snap our fingers and do.

 

A popular saying proposes that sleeping becomes interesting when a man has lost the purpose for waking up. How more easily can it be to lose the purpose for waking up than to consistently have no worthy goal to chase?

 

The idea is not to leave your job because you have gotten to a respectable pinnacle, neither is it to engage in haphazard activities under the guise of the opportunity to experience eclectic challenges. Rather, the simple charge is to put more of yourself into what your hand/heart finds to do per time. Always strive to outdo your yesterday self.

 

The moment you rest on your oars and sit back and relax like the proverbial rich fool mentioned in the Christian Holy book, you find that nothing really interests you anymore and all your achievements at those points amount to nothing. Kapish!

Live in the moment. Ride yourself on every wave. Be used up for a purpose considered by yourself and indeed nature as a mighty one. Never stop dreaming, never stop making demands of yourself. More importantly, never get stuck in the illusion of absolute comfort.

 

Have a great week ahead.

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A THING OR TWO CONCERNING ‘WAITING’

In all you do, ensure you do not waste your waiting time

-Anonymous

 

I think it is perfectly understandable to every thinking person that we cannot all have all we desire, more importantly, we can’t all have anything we desire exactly when we want. The common saying to support this assertion sounds like: “All fingers are not equal.” It is self explanatory, the quote. Proportion in any/all things isn’t a right. Nature has made it such that our experiences, abilities and indeed possessions cannot be balanced on any scale of measurement.

 

That said, these days, it is clear to me that a host of people live in a world of fantasy; they conjure up something in their mind they want and expect those things to happen at some ‘appropriate time’. And then when this fails to materialize, there is left no backup plan, and so going through the motions, being tossed around by every wind of happening is what some people resort to.

 

The thing is, why some fail mostly is because their IDEAL outlook of life doesn’t bear any resemblance to reality. When the shit hits the fan, and the truth stares them in the face that they are not even remotely capable of what they think they are capable of, there remains no form of order in their lives.

 

For most of us, while waiting for something to materialize, all we do is wait instead of working at establishing ourselves in some other strength or discipline. When you wait and what you wait for never shows up, then what you’re left with is all you’ve been able to accomplish during your waiting period.

 

Whether you’re waiting for a good job or one better than the one you’re in, or that truckload of cash needed to propel you to a pedestal devoid of the wishy syndrome, or a degree that stands you out in the crowd, or that super idea that will result in a groundbreaking innovation or revolution, you need to keep on DOING SOMETHING.

 

The onus lies on you today to carefully plan your life, see to it that no idle moment exists with/for you. Ensure that while chilling for an opening or opportunity, you’re not making a complete nuisance of yourself by building castles in the air. The wheel that is called life diligently seeks and requires only procactive people who seize time by the horns and are willing to contribute to its functioning in more ways than one.

 

May the odds always be in your favour!

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